Basketball Wives LA, "Season 2 Returns": shut up and punch each other already

Quick Take: Basketball Wives LA, "Season 2 Returns"
"I feel like what I bring to the table in these girls' lives is of much more value than what they bring to mine." - Jackie 

Review: Basketball Wives LA, "Season 2 Returns"
(S0201) I had high hopes going into last night's Season Two premiere of Basketball Wives LA. I caught a couple of episodes last season and I recall a show chock-full of smack downs, weave tears and drink throws.

Last night... eh, not so much. Scratch that, not at all. No torn weaves, no skimpy dresses stained with appletini residue, no black eyes. No fun.

Instead of the fisticuffs and fireworks I was expecting, "Season 2 Returns" gave us talking, and more talking, and talking around the dinner table, and talking beside the pool, and talking in the kitchen, then some more talking. SHUT UP AND PUNCH EACH OTHER ALREADY!

The early chatter revolved around how the Wives' are adjusting new cities. Malaysia, Jannero Pargo's wife, is loving Atlanta, although it took a while to get used to. Laura, Gilbert Arenas' suddenly skinny baby-mama, spent the basketball season in Orlando. Orlando is "cool" but things will Hibachi are "hard" and "tainted." Not sure why Agent Zero and his taint would be anywhere near this Joker-faced freak show (even if she did lose 100 pounds in the off-season) but that's his problem, not mine.

Jackie Christie was the center of attention and the object of much scorn and shit-talking throughout the episode. Jackie, the wife of former NBA baller Doug Christie, was the major instigator of drama last year and the focus of last night's premiere was the fallout from those dust-ups. Jackie is under the impression that haters be hatin' because she has everything the other girls wish they had. If the other girls wish they had a husband who could moonlight as an extra on Falling Skies, then yes, Jackie's got it. 

The lone highlight of the episode came in the form of a newcomer to the show: Brooke Bailey. Brooke is a friend of Draya's from the "urban modeling industry." Draya invited Brooke over to try on some items from Draya's new bikini fashion line. "I want to make sure they support girls with big boobs, and I know you have big boobs, and I hope that girls with big boobs wear them," Draya babbled. Draya seemed pleased with the way Brooke looked in her suit, but if it was boob support she was concerned with, Draya ought to head back to the drawing board. Brooke's ample bosom didn't even fit in the top, much less receive any support from it.

By Lucas High

About the author

Lucas High is a man on a mission. That mission: to watch television for a living. Drop him a line at lhigh2@gmail.com, on Facebook and on Twitter at twitter.com/LucasHigh.

More From Lucas High

"String theory is complicated, that's just yucky." - Sheldon
Read More
"Sometimes I'm like, 'How do I not O.D.?'" - Deanna
Read More
"We sell history." - Alex
Read More
1 Comment
On: Thursday, September 13, 2012
Ray said:

Lucas High, clearly you are a MAN not the least bit  concerned about the depiction or value of the Black women.  Why do you yearn so much for those moments that degrade African Americans?  I can almost guarantee that you parade the streets as a liberal, but this is your message?  Why don't you let someone smack the shit out of you!?

Name:

Email (Will not be used):

Comment:

characters left

Featured Shows

 
 

Featured Articles

Popular Today

 

Recent Comments

Parks and Recreation: why is everyone so mean to Jerry?
I can respect the opinion that you don't like the running gag in regards to Jerry, but at least recognize that he is hardly the...
Parks and Recreation: why is everyone so mean to Jerry?
I think everyone's attitude toward Jerry makes sense within the deliciously oddball universe that is Parks and Recreation. It's...
Supernatural, "The Girl with the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo": Revenge of the nerds
felicia day is one of the most overrated people in tv/film... if she didnt pretend to be a geeky girl, no one would even give 2...
Mad Men: a new coup at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce?
certainly we saw some of don's ugliest traits come out in this episode!
Mad Men: a new coup at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce?
I hate when the depressed, cheating scum Don is around. He is being such a jerk to Megan and she doesnt deserve it. His hypocritical...
Hannibal: 5 Things You Need to Know for the Season [Interview]
First, Fuller is one of the truly unique and great minds working in television today, so it's always exciting to see him roll out...
The Americans "Safe House": irony of all ironies
In regards to your Kramer vs. Kramer comment... Yup, you are right it was a time when divorce was more socially acceptable. I recall...
The Americans "Safe House": irony of all ironies
I had a few odd realizations while watching the episode. First is that this was the era of Kramer vs. Kramer. Not sure if that means...