Adam Wattenbarger

Member since: 2010-09-27

Stories By Adam Wattenbarger

"With a healthy diet you can live a long and healthy life... if nobody stabs you." - Barney's doctor
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"Sometimes you have to choose between love and talent." - Mercedes
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Steve Carell to exit The Office before May. Who will take over?
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"I'd give my first born to not be able to have children!" - Barney Stinson on Marshall's "problem"
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"NaOnka will not vote for me." - Brenda
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"I'm going to have to go to the wound care unit. Look at some wounds." - Sue Sylvester
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"I'm not perfect, I'm a humanitarian!" - NaOnka
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"Inside it smells like tears." - Andy Richter
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"It's going to continue to spread like cancerous tentacles through the tribe." - Marty, describing Jane
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An overview of the life of Life Unexpected circa Season Two.
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“It could go down as one of the stupidest moves ever, or maybe not.” - Marty
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"Our DVR won't recognize it as a television program." - Marshall Erickson, on Robin's show
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“It’s going to be legen – wait for it – I’ll send you an inter-office memo with the rest cause we freakin’ work together!” - Barney
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"It was like watching a horse die." - Anand
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Quick Take: How I Met Your Mother, "Subway Wars"
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"If this thing doesn't go viral, then there's no such thing as viral." - Clint
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"Whenever I pray I fall asleep." - Brittany
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"Isn't spy sex great?" - Heather Chandler
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"You can't delete contacts from your brain, Lily." - Robin Scherbatsky
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"You still have to live with these bitches." -Donald Trump
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